This fall, Carolina Dining Services introduced new kiosk ordering stations for many of its on-campus dining locations. These kiosks, resembling giant iPads, allow students to conveniently skip out on human interaction, a great relief to both the students and the staff. 

Unfortunately, the transition to the kiosks has not been as smooth as the university was hoping. 

The problem started one afternoon when a worker from the bagel shop, formerly known as Alpine, noticed a student spending an unusually long amount of time at the kiosk. 

Upon further investigation, the student (who has asked The Oh Well to remain anonymous) was found to be playing Subway Surfers on the screen. When asked to quit the game, said student refused, saying she was “about to beat her high score.”

Security was eventually able to remove her from the premises after she lost, having been hit by an oncoming train. 

One spectator was asked for his opinion on the events that transpired. “Her first mistake was picking up the jumping boots. You never pick up the jumping boots.” 

The incident, along with others, has led CDS to rethink the new kiosk system. “We’re looking into installing parental controls on all of the ordering stations,” stated a CDS representative. “If that doesn’t work, dining locations around campus might have to try a radical new alternative: having customers order by mouth.”